struggle. i believe more people have been struggling lately than normal. and the struggles have been harder. BUT... most of who i know who are experiencing such struggles are for the first time in their lives taking a look at why they're struggling. it's not been so easy for me, though i have done my damndest to make strides. and i have.
my daughter was stung by a bee. no reaction. 48 hours later her foot was the size of a potato. ER. drugs. pediatrician. then the health insurance said we weren't covered anymore... and then i wanted to snuff myself. after picking up three different drugs we were on our way to recovery. but now we have to have epi-pens everywhere in case it happens again. if you're not a person with severe, fatal allergies, you probably don't know that an epi-pen costs upwards of $100. fantastic!
so what's the point of all this? i don't know! just another struggle. life has done a couple of numbers on me -- on us all. but what is struggle for? you'd have to ask my sister Amber Diaz. she's the spiritual guru -- i'm just the street-fighting writer. that said, i see struggle as an opportunity... when i'm not feeling the struggle of the struggle, if that makes any sense.
my child is everything. if she gets stung by a bee again i'll call 911, pray, hope. to quote myself:
"She's potty trained, wearing underpants, and quite proud of herself. She'll be a solid person because that's how I'll raise her -- whether I'm working at Taco Bell or pulling in six figures freelancing. (...) She's why I do anything. She's why I do everything."
Epi-pens are my Klondike bars now.
what would i do for an epi-pen? You name it.
As for struggle, be it emotional, financial, spiritual, physical, or all of the above, i'm game. it's made me better.
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